Plastics

Well, pandamonium was really fun. We didn't seem to have as many people come out this year, but there was an amazing atmosphere on and off the mats. It was great how many people participated in the 24hours of continuous Kung fu. 
While in Houston, Brandi was telling me about a documentary she watched called addicted to plastic. She found it depressing and very discouraging, but she decided she wanted to then try to go zero waste. Which sounds like something anyone could accomplish, but it's definitely not as easy as one would think. We were even talking about how it's virtually impossible to buy berries that aren't in plastic. So this again has made me more conscious of what I'm purchasing and how it's packaged.

The cool thing is that just like 2 days after I got home, I found out that Bulk Barn is now allowing people to bring in reusable containers. I remember the first time I tried this and the discussion that ensued with the cashier as to why I wasn't able to do that. To me, that was the biggest reason to shop there. It was really frustrating. Happy to say, I made my first purchase this week in a reusable glass jar. This isn't a Bulk Barn advertisement or anything, but I think it's worthwhile for a lot of people to check it out. It's crazy how something so small can be so rewarding. I think if we all shopped more mindfully, the idea of zero waste would be much more realistic. It's something that I'm working on this year. One purchase at a time.

Houston

I've been having a great time here with Brandi and her husband Simon. It's great to get out of the routine and mix things up for a refresher.  We spent a large part of this morning talking about dreams and the subconscious mind.  Simon is great to bounce ideas off of because his major is religious studies and the occult and so he has many different cultural and spiritual references to draw from.

Simon was also a classmate of ours in China.  So the three of us spent yesterday morning all going through some forms together.  Discussing applications and the internal theory of movements.  So even though I'm away, I've been able to get some really great practice in.  I needed this time to really get back into a positive mindset.

This morning we went to a craft museum which was both super interesting and also very heavy.  There was an exhibit there focusing on veterans and the art they've created to deal with their feelings while trying to reintegrate back into society.  It really provokes thought to the struggle that veterans must go through.  It brought me mentally back to the kind-act-a-thon. Reminding myself of the power of kindness.  I've been really taking the time to look for opportunities for acts of kindness.  Keeping that at the forefront while I'm here.  Taking time to smile at a museum security guard and hold the door for someone. I'm looking forward to pandamonium.

Just Show Up

This week has been an interesting one for me personally. This year so far, outside of losing energy and struggling physically, I've stayed in a pretty good frame of mind. However, for some odd reason, this week I felt pretty unmotivated and frustrated with my training. I learned something valuable though, as always. One, I learned that I can still get excited about kung fu when I show up and go to classes. Two, even though I felt unmotivated I still got a lot done by just showing up and participating. I've also been having tonnes of fun with the Kind-Act-A-Thon. Being mindful about it really brings me back to the moment, which is something I certainly need some help with right now.

My aunt called me early in the week and asked me to talk to the family of someone she knows that's in the ICU at the UofA with GBS right now. That's a lot of acronyms in a single sentence. Ha. I've been having all sorts of bad dreams since which leave me with a pit of dread in place of my stomach. It's not like I've never talked about it before. But I've never talked to someone that's suffering from it right now. I don't know what to say and I'm scared I'll make things worse. I know how scary it is to be paralyzed and unable to talk, but I've never talked to someone paralyzed and unable to talk.

I'm leaving on Friday night to go hang out with my sister for the long weekend. A much needed break and time spent with someone that I've shared so much with. I'm so lucky to have her. I can hope I come back in a better frame of mind and a clearer perspective.

The Real Impact

I wanted to say thanks to everyone who came out to the pitch in project this weekend. It was a beautiful day, and because there were many hands, it made light work for everyone. Although those soggy bikes weren't exactly 'light'.

As much as I like this project  for it's obvious reasons, team work, community service, and a good ol' fashion cleanup, I always find it a little disheartening.

I know I've written this before, but I have the same internal dialogue each time I go. I find it so frustrating that we have to pick up the garbage. Not because someone didn't throw it in the garbage can, but because it exists at all. I work pretty hard at reducing my impact and especially since I live out in the country, I do a lot of driving. So I focus on the things I can really control. What I'm buying, and what I do with whatever waste I'm left with. I find a lot of the things we're picking up are recyclable, but past the point of really saving. There are so many paper cups with lids, fast food bags, and candy wrappers I just want to scream sometimes. I've often made comments about China and how, there, you can see the garbage because people just throw it on the ground. Just because we pick up the garbage and put it somewhere you can't see, doesn't mean it's gone. It's just hidden so we're not faced with the reality of our real impact on the environment.

This is why I love Silent River. Part of our intelligent curriculum is developing things like empathy, and personal and environmental self defense. If we can get people educated, hopefully it will help change the way someone looks at a plastic bag, a Styrofoam cup, or a cardboard box. Maybe they will see the real impact of their actions and make different choices.

Vermicomposting

So Vermicomposting, or the fancy name for composting with worms, is my new project to reduce my environmental impact.

Vermicomposting is a great way to compost especially for people that don't have access to a yard. I do have a yard, but outdoor composting gets complicated in the winter time here. Also, if you're able to compost, recycle, and reuse, you can significantly reduce the waste being produced by your household. I learned that generally one worm bin is enough for two people, so a large family, might need to get creative or possible starting blending their compostables before giving them to the worms.

I mentioned that in Spruce Grove we were lucky enough to have a city compost pick up, but it was also pointed out that although that's great, it takes fuel to truck around picking up all the compost bins. Valid point. Also that you never know what your neighbour is throwing in their compost bin. If you have your own worm bin, you know exactly what goes into it. And what comes out of it is amazingly rich and nutritious soil.

I feel like there is also some spiritual benefits of physically dealing with the worms. It forces you to get up close and personal with what your soil is made out of and teaches you an appreciation for what a huge impact such a small creature can make. I've really been enjoying this process.

I took a course on composting with worms, and I'd say so far I've only really been mildly successful. My worms haven't died, but they're not flourishing. But, I'm still learning, so hopefully with time, I'll be able to expand my small worm bin into two.

Ego

I was reading a book this week and there was a line in it that really stuck with me. There are four phrases that lead to wisdom: "I'm sorry. I was wrong. I need help. I don't know."

We've had a lot of lessons recently on the importance of setting aside our egos when it comes to learning. It's easy to think to myself that I approach my learning with an open mind, but I know if I am honest with myself, that's not always true.

At the beginning of each class as I step onto the mats, I've been thinking to myself, "I am an empty vessel." This has really been helping me to get into the right mental state to learn and absorb new lessons. I've always been a fan of learning through teaching. I love questions that challenge my knowledge and make me analyze the intricacies of the things I'm doing. It's very easy to become complacent and assume that I am doing something right when in fact, I am wrong. I am learning to say things like, "I don't know", but have also been gaining a lot of confidence in answering questions that I feel I do know the answers to. Hopefully with this perspective, I will get the most out of the opportunities I have ahead of me.

Goals

I thought since this Sunday I will be busy with a lot of family stuff, I'd start my long weekend off right.

I had a moment last night. A very important mental breakthrough for me. It wasn't about my flow as Sifu Brinker was trying to show us all, it was about my goals and what they mean to me.

For the last two years on the team, I had meditation as a goal. The first year, I had number of minutes, and this year I just tried for meditation every day. No matter the quantity. And for the last two years I've struggled with this goal. I have a hard time incorporating it into my day and I would say mostly it's because I let myself get too distracted and I'm not prioritizing it.

 I had so many reasons as to why I wanted meditation as a goal. It would help me manage stress (very important for auto-immune diseases), help me sleep better, keep me in a healthy mental state. I forgot one very important reason though. The most important reason for me and the easiest way for me to motivate myself to be disciplined. I really love meditation. I really like sitting still, somewhere quiet and preferably dimly lit, and just letting go while I focus on my breath. It's been a long time since I've sat and meditated and not felt distracted.

All of those other things are important benefits that meditation can have, but they don't motivate as much as just practicing something that I enjoy. I small shift in perspective.