Over the past 7 or so years, I have moved away from a lot of the friends and acquaintances. I feel like I have changed so much that I find it hard to relate to some of my old friends. We've grown apart and that's okay. Natural as we all grow out of our teenage years and early twenties. A lot of my friends are either still spending their time drinking beers and watching TV or they have gone in a different direction. Having children, and moving into that new phase in their lives.
Since being in the I Ho Chuan, the kwoon has become not only a place for training and pushing my limits, but a place full of people I can relate to. Which seems funny sometimes because I look around sometimes and we are very different people outside of the kwoon. Different occupations, different religions, disparate values in a lot of ways. Although we are a diverse group, we have a similar passion that brings us together. Not just kung fu, but our own pursuit of mastery. Kung fu is so much more than just physical fitness and martial skill. It's my most valuable tool for personal progress. And if I can learn to utilize that tool correctly, it's something that I could share with those around me.
As the year of the Monkey is starting to wind down, I've been thinking a lot about this year and reflecting on the progress and struggles of my year. Brandi told me the other day that for "the Ox" (my Chinese Zodiac), the past few years have been very difficult, but the coming year is supposed to give them a fresh start. I'm really hoping that next year is a bit easier than the last few. I know that struggling is what makes us learn and grow, but I'd like a little bit of time to recuperate. Keeping my fingers crossed for the Year of the Rooster.
Sunday 27 November 2016
Tuesday 15 November 2016
New Year's Resolutions
I've never been the New Year's resolution type. I guess I figured it would most likely end how most peoples' end, with me not following through. There's no point in lying to myself about what changes I'm going to make. Instead I chose to make decisions throughout the year that I wanted to be permanent. There was no glamour of having a list of changes, just some boring lifestyle change that I never really shared with anyone. My own thing, my own willpower.
I've been thinking a lot since the meeting about how my life has possibly changed since joining the I Ho Chuan. Not just this year, but every year since I came home. I did my first year of the I Ho Chuan while still living in China. From New Years until October I did all of my training and blogging while still in Wudang. At the time I didn't realize how much more difficult the I Ho Chuan would be living at home. More responsibilities and distractions.
While discussing whether or not to continue on next year's team with Sifu Brinker, I had a small moment of realization. Since I finished my training in China, I have been on the team every year. Different levels of participation required of course, but still, I've always had the I Ho Chuan to help guide my transition. I never had a plan for when I came home. I just wanted to open my own school. There. Plan created. I had no steps in mind to make that happen. Just some vague idea of a goal.
So the thing is here that, had I not gotten sick and decided to move, I would have had a ridiculous amount of work ahead. I had no idea where I was going and what I was doing. We talk about incremental progression, that would have been full blown flip over upside down and hang there for a while trying to get my head straight. The I Ho Chuan has provided me a way to set my goals, and to hold myself accountable. Not just to the team, but to myself. It's given me some direction. Especially during my recovery this past year. And now that the progress is less obvious, is when I need it most. I get to choose a lot of my own goals, and they are things that I have decided are valuable, and can help me improve myself and take deliberate steps towards mastery. My goal is still the same. I want to teach. But I've realized that there are many opportunities to teach. Teaching compassion and empathy through my own actions and words. Teaching the value of hard work and discipline through my own experiences and training.
"If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
I've been thinking a lot since the meeting about how my life has possibly changed since joining the I Ho Chuan. Not just this year, but every year since I came home. I did my first year of the I Ho Chuan while still living in China. From New Years until October I did all of my training and blogging while still in Wudang. At the time I didn't realize how much more difficult the I Ho Chuan would be living at home. More responsibilities and distractions.
While discussing whether or not to continue on next year's team with Sifu Brinker, I had a small moment of realization. Since I finished my training in China, I have been on the team every year. Different levels of participation required of course, but still, I've always had the I Ho Chuan to help guide my transition. I never had a plan for when I came home. I just wanted to open my own school. There. Plan created. I had no steps in mind to make that happen. Just some vague idea of a goal.
So the thing is here that, had I not gotten sick and decided to move, I would have had a ridiculous amount of work ahead. I had no idea where I was going and what I was doing. We talk about incremental progression, that would have been full blown flip over upside down and hang there for a while trying to get my head straight. The I Ho Chuan has provided me a way to set my goals, and to hold myself accountable. Not just to the team, but to myself. It's given me some direction. Especially during my recovery this past year. And now that the progress is less obvious, is when I need it most. I get to choose a lot of my own goals, and they are things that I have decided are valuable, and can help me improve myself and take deliberate steps towards mastery. My goal is still the same. I want to teach. But I've realized that there are many opportunities to teach. Teaching compassion and empathy through my own actions and words. Teaching the value of hard work and discipline through my own experiences and training.
"If you want to build a ship, don't drum up people together to collect wood and don't assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Thursday 10 November 2016
Brain Sludge
I have been agonizing over what to write for days now. I don't want to blog about Trump. Although I've been thinking about him for many days now, I don't have anything to say. I'm still in shock.
I had to put our lovely not even 2 year old cat down this Monday, which was hard on me. No matter what anyone says, I still feel guilty about it. I did everything I could, but it just wasn't enough, and it made me feel helpless and sad.
On a brighter note, I've decided to join the rooster team. Ms. Bergstreiser reminded me of the encouragement I gave her to join the team last year and I was reminded of my reasons why I thought the team would be great for her. Even though she was on "light duties" there were still many great steps forward on her part and look at where she's at now.
Sometimes it's great to have a friend and teammate give you back your perspective.
I've been meditating and practicing qi gong or tai chi nearly every night since Tiger Challenge. I thought a lot about what I want my goals to be for next year, and I thought about all of the things that I could do rather than all of the things I couldn't. I feel kind of like, "the little engine that could".
I had to put our lovely not even 2 year old cat down this Monday, which was hard on me. No matter what anyone says, I still feel guilty about it. I did everything I could, but it just wasn't enough, and it made me feel helpless and sad.
On a brighter note, I've decided to join the rooster team. Ms. Bergstreiser reminded me of the encouragement I gave her to join the team last year and I was reminded of my reasons why I thought the team would be great for her. Even though she was on "light duties" there were still many great steps forward on her part and look at where she's at now.
Sometimes it's great to have a friend and teammate give you back your perspective.
I've been meditating and practicing qi gong or tai chi nearly every night since Tiger Challenge. I thought a lot about what I want my goals to be for next year, and I thought about all of the things that I could do rather than all of the things I couldn't. I feel kind of like, "the little engine that could".
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