This week has been an interesting one for me personally. This year so far, outside of losing energy and struggling physically, I've stayed in a pretty good frame of mind. However, for some odd reason, this week I felt pretty unmotivated and frustrated with my training. I learned something valuable though, as always. One, I learned that I can still get excited about kung fu when I show up and go to classes. Two, even though I felt unmotivated I still got a lot done by just showing up and participating. I've also been having tonnes of fun with the Kind-Act-A-Thon. Being mindful about it really brings me back to the moment, which is something I certainly need some help with right now.
My aunt called me early in the week and asked me to talk to the family of someone she knows that's in the ICU at the UofA with GBS right now. That's a lot of acronyms in a single sentence. Ha. I've been having all sorts of bad dreams since which leave me with a pit of dread in place of my stomach. It's not like I've never talked about it before. But I've never talked to someone that's suffering from it right now. I don't know what to say and I'm scared I'll make things worse. I know how scary it is to be paralyzed and unable to talk, but I've never talked to someone paralyzed and unable to talk.
I'm leaving on Friday night to go hang out with my sister for the long weekend. A much needed break and time spent with someone that I've shared so much with. I'm so lucky to have her. I can hope I come back in a better frame of mind and a clearer perspective.
3 comments:
I think having someone who's experienced this talking to me would help tremendously if I went through this. Someone who could tell me what to expect and that would just talk to me about anything to keep my mind from focusing fully on just the pain. I can't even to begin to imagine how much you suffered and I can't think of anyone with as much heart as you have to help this person through this.
Ditto on what Lindsay said.
It is scary. But it is also helpful and you have so much to offer. Having visited you when you were in the hospital, I have to say that it was a very powerful experience. It was uplifting and beautiful to watch you fight back and seeing your spirit soar above the illness. When you are ready, it would be great for you to experience that same beauty.
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