Competition

I find myself worn out and especially frustrated right now. There is an upcoming competition that we've all been 'encouraged'  to enter. I have to say that I am naturally quite a competitive person and so try to avoid this setting. Being the younger sibling, as a kid, I was always out to prove myself to my sister and to my family. As I've grown older, I've realized I don't have anything to prove to them. They don't care if I win or lose, they love me all the same.

This is not always true of myself. I struggle a lot against my own ego. I don't know if everyone encounters this, but it's something I've become used to. Sometimes it helps motivate me, and sometimes it's very detrimental. Generally, I try to keep the attitude that the only person worth competing with is myself.

I'm struggling to keep that posture right now. How else do you compete but by comparing yourself to those around you? I am using this opportunity to improve my forms, and in that sense, find the process very exciting. Yet, it has already proved to be an arduous exercise for me. I hope that no matter what the outcome proves to be, that I can keep my ego in check and use this as another learning experience.